Mortgage Dept.




Do you still offer those mortgages with hardly any money down, super low rates and no payments unless you threaten me?

Secretary needed

I need urgently a secretary like this.
Good salary, does not work weekends or holidays.
Essential good presence and a lot of dedication to work.




Loans




We're offering you an assumable mortgage.
We assume you'll make the payments and you can assume we'll make your life miserable if you don't.